The Meeting Place

One of the very first assignments I was given at Y&R Geneva was to help update the Baboo Airlines meeting point in the Geneva Airport.

Our initial idea was pretty grand. Having spent time at GVA, it was apparent the people waiting for their loved ones to come through customs were a captive audience begging for some diversion.

One of the walls featured a manifesto on why Baboo makes a difference. There were little pieces of copy scattered all over the board that were whimsical little discoveries that demonstrated the care Baboo gave its customers. And we had the entire board painted in Baboo red to make it really stand out. The initial idea was well-received.

Then we learned that the meeting place was going to be dismantled by December, and that to paint it all red, each board would have to be individually dismantled, and they didn't have a the budget for something of that scale and could we do something a little simpler?


I had a lot of heart for the original idea. But considering this is only going to be up for another few weeks, I guess I can't Baboo for being practical.

McSwiss Burgers

With rare exceptions, I avoid going to McDonald's outside of America. I want to experience a foreign culture, not McHegemony.

But the McDonald's in Switzerland are currently running a promotion called Semaines Suisse (Swiss Weeks), and they're featuring a different burger each week with uniquely Swiss ingredients.

There's the McSpeck, the McGruyere, and the McEmmental.

So far, I've only had the McEmmental, which I liked quite a bit. With the large fries it wasn't an entirely foreign experience. But at least it wasn't the same kind of Big Mac I could have picked up in Chicago.

Two impressions about the McEmmental:

1. The cheese makes all the difference. It tastes nothing like a McDonald's hamburger, and is therefore consumable guilt-free. I could almost convince myself that it was homemade.
   
2. This would be a complete failure in the States. 

More reviews to come. I can't wait for the McGruyere.

Queen's English As A Second Language

All of our clients are international. And almost all of them advertise in English. But I've learned that it's English English. Not American English. So program becomes programme. Color becomes colour. And z becomes zed. (Not that you use zeds very much because realize is realise, sterilize is sterilise, etc.)

As if learning French weren't enough.

I've heard from even more American expat friends that their coworkers are congratulating them on the Obama victory. It seems that Europeans simply assume that all Americans wanted Obama to win.

When you're following the election of a foreign nation, I think the story is drastically simplified.

How foreigners see McCain: He is in the same party as George Bush and he wants the war in Iraq to keep going. He's old and used to be a soldier or something like that. He also has a running mate who's really religious who used to live in the forest and shoot bears.

How foreigners see Obama: He is a black man (no one uses "African American" here), and he wants to fix everything George W. Bush messed up. He wants to end the war in Iraq. He smiles a lot and even took time to visit Europe, so he must care about us.

No one considers the economy or taxes. And forget about things like constitutional amendments, and gay rights. I can almost guarantee no one in Switzerland thinks "Obama won? That's great because he's pro-choice and wants to reform health care."

When Viktor Yushchenko was running for president in Ukraine, didn't you want him to win just because he dissented from Russian control and his opponents poisoned him and his face turned blue and you wanted to see him overcome that adversity? That was their story simplified for us.

The Swiss Are Watching

My coworkers are congratulating me today. No one asks if I'm Republican or Democrat, who I voted for or if I voted. They just congratulate me and say, "You must be very excited."

On my way to lunch, I saw a couple of Obama stickers in the street. Wish I had my camera with me. It's amazing to realize the scope of yesterday's election. Even in Geneva, there's a palpable excitement, though I'm sure it's nothing like Grant Park will be later today.

Globally, I'm certain more people were rooting for an Obama win. I wonder what the mood would have been had McCain pulled one out.

Election Night As Viewed from Six Hours Ahead

Being six hours ahead of the earliest polls to close, I figured I'd be up refreshing the browser on CNN.com every half hour anyway, so why not enjoy myself?

I spent election night in Geneva attending a James Bond double-feature with a couple friends. Casino Royale followed by the all-new Quantum of Solace. The first started at 9 pm, and I returned home a little after 2:00 am.

By then, the only news was that McCain had carried Kentucky and Obama won Vermont. Big surprises there.

Of course, now I'm operating on about 5 hours of sleep. But whatever.

An Expat's Election Day Confessional

I waited too long to send in my absentee ballot.

One of the first things my wife and I did when we arrived in Switzerland was log onto votefromabroad.org and request our absentee ballots. But last week I called the U.S. consulate in Geneva to ask them when I could bring by my ballot and was told, “You’re a bit late for that.” (To add insult to injury, the guy who answered the phone didn’t even sound American. He was either

 French with an English accent or the other way around.)

He suggested I send my ballot by DHL or FedEx. I had wanted to use the consulate because postage is paid as long as it’s dropped off at a U.S. military base or branch of the U.S. embassy. But I was willing to do what it took to make sure my vote was counted.

Then I discovered that sending my ballot by courier would be 50 francs – about $45. While that’s a trivial price to pay for participating in democracy, two things occurred to me:

1. I was voting with an Illinois ballot. Not exactly a battleground state
2. Despite being united in all things, my wife and I voted for different candidates this year. So we effectively cancelled each other. (This is probably the Swiss neutrality taking its toll.)
   

If I lived in a battleground state, there would have been no question. But as it is, I decided not to pay $45 to have my wife and I cancel each other’s votes in Obama’s home state.

I was really sick about this for a day or two. And I’m embarrassed to the point that I consider lying every time a coworker asks if I’ve voted. But I’m more at ease airing my mistake., and vowing to send in my next ballot much, much earlier.

Go ahead. Call me a hypocrite. Call me ungrateful. Call me un-America. Just wire your 50 francs to my Swiss bank account when you do.

They celebrate Halloween in Switzerland. Who knew?

I didn't expect Halloween to be observed in Switzerland. So I was surprised when special sections of the supermarket began featuring costumes, candy and decorations. (I didn't see much reflective tape, but that's because this country isn't so litigious.)

Friday night, we got a few trick-or-treaters. Not as many as in the suburbs of Chicago. But more than I would have imagined in the Alps. The costumes were pretty simple. When I brought out the candy, they seemed a bit greedier and more ravenous than American kids. But maybe that was just enthusiasm.

From what I understand, most Europeans think Halloween is more about scaring each other than about dressing up and getting candy. That seems odd until you realize the only information they get about Halloween in America is from horror movies. Jason and Freddy don't knock on doors and ask for Milk Duds. That's why a lot of our non-American friends thought it was weird that we were having a Halloween party at our church.

Three months ago, I was asked to be the chairman of our church's activities committee. I didn't realize exactly what was being asked of me. I learned later that it was a pretty huge deal because it tends to extend beyond the congregation and into the American expat community. Where else are World Health Organization and UN families going to celebrate if not at the Mormon chapel?

I began to feel like an intern who was asked to conduct a shareholder's meeting. Or maybe what Sarah Palin might feel like if McCain is elected and dies within the first 100 days.

But I had a lot of help. The party was cool. People had a nice time. All the kids had too much candy and not enough sleep. And isn't that really what Halloween's all about?

I kept with my unintended tradition of dressing as something creative that no one understands. Past efforts include "Relentless Passion" (shirt off with my entire upperbody painted red), and "Tooth Decay" (candy taped to my clothes that ended in a National Geographic-like feeding frenzy).

This year I tried going as a Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade balloon of myself. I tied strings to my arms, legs and waist and attached little Playmobil men to look like they were keeping me tethered.

A few people saw me and said, "Are you supposed to be Gulliver and the Liliputians?" Points to them for literacy. But that only lasted a few minutes before the strings and toys became too tangled for me to walk. Then I just gave up and went looking for a pair of scissors. Next year, maybe I'll just go as a Jedi like every other 35-year-old guy.